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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23612089">Just Breathe</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/deepinsidemy_rockhardbrain/pseuds/deepinsidemy_rockhardbrain'>deepinsidemy_rockhardbrain</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:22:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,230</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23612089</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/deepinsidemy_rockhardbrain/pseuds/deepinsidemy_rockhardbrain</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I took it too far didn’t I?” she asked from the doorway.</p><p>Without looking at her he spoke “yeah”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>68</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Just Breathe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>S7 set after Valloweaster. Thoughts on what happened after Jake and Amy left the bar. Hoping it's not too OOC for either of them. I'm not good at angst so it's just a short chapter.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The drive home from Shaw's Bar had been decidedly quiet. As Amy drove them home, Jake sat in the passenger seat, scrolling through social media or looking out the window.</p><p>Once home, Jake followed Amy up the steps outside their building and inside to their door, stepping forward with his keys he put it in the lock and twisted, pushing the door open he let Amy go in before walking in and shutting the door behind him.</p><p>He watched as Amy went to the kitchen and opened the fridge, he knew she would be getting herself (and their baby boy) some weird snack combo. Chucking his keys onto the sideboard, he shrugged off his jacket and hung it up before toeing off his sneakers, dipping to pick them up he carried them to the to the shoe unit in the bedroom.  Sitting down on the end on the bed, he rested his hands on his knees, closing his eyes and letting his head fall backwards, he let out a sigh.</p><p>He had done many things over the years to help him get ahead in the heists, to get one over on someone, but he had never messed with people’s feelings in such a serious way. Finding out his wife and his best friend were listening in to his ‘therapy’ sessions was one thing, he thought as he racked his brain, going back over all the things they had spoke about, but it was another to find out that the person he had finally agreed to speak with was an actor paid for by his wife. He flopped back on the bed, bringing his hands to his face, he rubbed at it.</p><p>Putting the jar of pickles back in the fridge and realising Jake wasn’t coming back from the bedroom, Amy walked down the hall to their room, her stomach jumped at the sight of him flopped out across their bed “I took it too far didn’t I?” she asked from the doorway.</p><p>Without looking at her he spoke “yeah”</p><p>Amy bit at her lip, and tugged on her shirt, smoothing over her growing bump “I am <em>so</em> sorry babe. I never meant to hurt you, or betray your trust. It honestly seemed funny at the time but-“</p><p>Jake pushed himself up “Ames, you <em>knew</em> how hard it was for me to finally agree to see someone. I’m well aware I take things to the line but I’ve <em>never</em> gone this far with anything I’ve done”</p><p>Amy’s heart was beating fast, she wasn’t used to seeing Jake this despondent, especially because of something she had done. She stepped into the room “Jake. I truly am sorry”</p><p>“Yeah I know, you've said. But I’m <em>really</em> pissed about it right now, and you would be too. So if it’s OK with you, I’m gunna go be mad in the living room tonight.” He said standing up and crossing the room.</p><p>“Oh right, um OK. Yeah I mean I can sleep out there if you-“</p><p>Turning from the dresser he said “No, you’re pregnant, you can sleep in the bed. I’m pissed, I’m not a <em>monster </em>Amy” rolling his eyes he pulled out shorts and a faded NYPD t-shirt and headed to the door. </p><p>Standing alone in the middle of their room, tears pricked at Amy’s eyes. She had no right to be upset, she needed to fix this but was unsure how.  Her thoughts were interrupted when baby decided that now was the exact moment to remind her he was there and that he was going to push up into her ribs until she rubbed her fingers at the moving lump. “Oh baby boy, mama has made a huge mistake” she said quietly to the bump as tears she had tried to control started to fall down her cheeks.</p><p>She only had herself to blame for this. There was no need for her to take it as far as she did or for as long as she did. Damn her competitive streak and damn her need to prove herself to others. Getting changed into her pajamas she padded barefoot across the hall to the bathroom, catching a glimpse of Jake on the sofa with the Switch, the TV on low in the background.</p><p>Despite being tired, Amy struggled to fall asleep. Her mind kept drifting back to the sessions with Jake and the actor where she listened to him talk. From his childhood; where him and Gina used to hang out at his Nana’s apartment, to joining the Academy and meeting Rosa, becoming a beat cop and a Detective. He spoke a lot about work, far more than he had about his early years. He loved the precinct and he clearly loved everyone he worked with. He enjoyed the heists, the rivalry and competition but he loved the fun that went with it.  Amy remembered how he excitedly told the 'Therapist' about the plans he had, first for Halloween, then rethinking details for Valentines day and then again for Easter. It seemed like such a good idea at the time, as she led in the vent making notes. </p><p>Amy loved how Jakes brain worked, how he got his ideas. He was such a quick thinker and she had come to love how he worried about any potential consequences later, but ultimately she knew he was right, he had never messed this hard with someone. Amy knew he would never do this to her, and her chest ached as she had flash backs to his face when he found out. <em>I am an awful wife</em> she said to herself.</p><p>………….</p><p>Waking the next morning, after finally falling into an unsettled sleep, which was further disturbed by three  visits to the bathroom, Amy stretched out, finding the bed empty and cold she remembered why. Her kind, thoughtful, husband was sleeping on the sofa because she had been completely <em>thoughtless</em>.</p><p>Leaning over and looking at the clock on her bedside table she saw it was late, well, late got her anyway. Nine thirty, luckily it was a Saturday. Feeling thirsty and hungry, she got out of bed, walking past one of Jakes hoodies, she picked it up and held it to her, breathing in his smell, before wrapping it round her shoulders and sliding her arms into the sleeves. First stop bathroom.</p><p>………….</p><p>As quietly as she could Amy made Jake a coffee using their new machine, every so often checking over to Jake to see if he had stirred.  Nothing. Taking the mug of coffee over to his sleeping form, she noticed how Jake had curled up, wrapping the sofa blankets around himself like a cocoon, with the Switch laying discarded on the coffee table. Picking it up she carefully returned it to the charging dock and went back to the coffee table.</p><p>Sitting down in front of him, she stretched her hand out, hesitating at first before gently running her fingers through his unruly dark hair, pushing it back from his forehead. Slowly moving his head at the feel of her fingers, Jake opened his eyes, blinking through the very sleepy feeling. Like Amy, he hadn't sleep well either. </p><p>Jake looked up at his wife, he could see concern etched on her face as her eyes met his. Giving him a shy smile “morning” she said, taking her hand away and resting her forearm across her knees.</p><p>“Morning” he said returning her smile with a cute one of his own</p><p>“I made you a coffee” she said with a small shrug offering it to him.</p><p>Adjusting so he was resting on an elbow he took the cup from her, blowing gently and taking a sip. “Thanks” he said quietly</p><p>“Um, Jake? Can we talk?”</p><p>Not speaking, Jake leant forward setting the mug down on a coaster, and then lifted up the blankets, inviting Amy to be little spoon on the sofa with him. Shifting carefully from the table to the sofa, Amy shuffled down onto her side and tucked back into Jake as he made room for her and the bump, bringing his arm over her he brought the blankets back round them.</p><p>“So about yesterday…” Amy trailed off.</p><p>“Ames, I’m still pissed” he felt her take a deep breath “<em>but</em> I get it, I do. The heists bring out the best and worst in all of us. We <em>all</em> get carried away.  It’s just, I really thought I was getting somewhere, with the therapy, ya know? Then it turned out to not be real and you had a hand in it. I guess it stung more cos I realised how much it was actually helping and I should of done it ages ago.” His hand moved from the blanket and splayed on Amys belly, rubbing small circles and getting movement from their son in return. He had missed cuddling with her last night but he knew he had needed the time on his own to think, digest and get his head right.</p><p>“I really am so sorry. I <em>honestly</em> never wanted to make you feel bad or to hurt you. I love you. <em>So much</em>. I would never want you to think you can’t trust me or that I don’t take your feelings seriously, because I do.” Amys voice sounded small and Jake could tell she was trying to hold back crying.</p><p>Jake pressed a kiss to Amys shoulder, or rather his hoodie, holding her to him.</p><p>“And I do know that, I know you would never hurt me on purpose, but maybe we agree some new heist rules, for just us, so we don’t have to do this again? And I love you too by the way. So much."</p><p>Amy nodded “Will we be OK? Can you forgive me?”</p><p>“What? Of course we will be OK. Ames, you’re my forever, I’ve forgiven you, even if you can be mean. <em>Owww</em>” he whined dramatically as she lightly elbowed him “that was mean”</p><p>“I barely touched you”</p><p>“<em>I barely touched you</em>. Title of your sex tape. Boom!” It was enough for any awkwardness they were both still feeling to disappear, as they both chuckled together, falling into a comfortable silence.</p><p>After a while, Amy moved so she was on her back, and then with some huffing, she was on her side facing Jake, reaching up she cupped the side of Jakes face, her thumb running over his bottom lip and light stubble already coming through on his chin. Dipping his head Jake kissed his wife. He enjoyed the warm feel of her hand on his jaw as she kissed him back.</p><p>“I was wondering, if there was anything I could do to make it up to you. I mean, I’m not at my sexist but I’m sure I can pull something out of the bag” Amy said pulling apart and using her best seductress voice.</p><p>Closing his eyes and letting a lazy grin spread across his face, Jakes free hand dropped to her butt before giving it a squeeze, then sliding his fingers down her thigh he lifted it until it was hooked over his. Opening his eyes, he looked straight into hers “You are <em>always</em> sexy Ames. But in answer to your question, yes there is something you can do.”</p><p>Trying not to rock herself on Jakes thigh, she raised her brows “What is it?”</p><p>Abruptly pushing himself so he was now sat up, Amy stared up at him in bewilderment. Suddenly remembering his manners, he helped Amy maneuver into a sitting position as he got up “Mario Party!” he said pointing at the device sat by the TV.</p><p>“Oh” Amy replied, slightly disappointed. She was hoping his request was sexual because, and she knew this shouldn’t be about her, she desperately needed to have him inside her. This was the part of the pregnancy that her and Jake had very much made the most of. She wasn’t feeling sick, or tired, or sweaty or cranky. She was feeling horny. All. Of. The. Time.</p><p>“Yeah Mario Party. That. We can definitely do that.” She said smiling and holding out her hand for the console as he stood grinning at her.</p><p>“I’m <em>joking</em> babe. Bedroom.” He thumbed over his shoulder as he took her still outstretched hand in his, pulling her up off the sofa. Unzipping his hoodie she was wearing, he peeled it off over her shoulders and threw it down on the sofa. “Won’t be needing that he said as he guided her round the coffee table and down the hall, stopping by their drinks cabinet slash sideboard. Taking the hem of her pajama top he pulled it off over her head in one swift movement, leaving her hair disheveled and falling across her bare shoulders and chest.</p><p>“Uh Jake, I thought this was about me doing something for you”</p><p>“Oh Ames. You <em>are</em> doing something for me” rolling her eyes she pulled him closer to her, pressing up on her toes to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. Jakes hands were pressing on her naked back, his fingers beginning to trace up and down her spine as he rested his forehead on hers “Now, to the bedroom”</p><p>Knowing what was to follow, she took his hand in hers as the walked to the bedroom, only letting go once they had reached the foot of the bed to help him remove his t-shirt. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
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